Having a baby should bring you closer to God. You’re filled with an immense love for your child. The same type of love that God felt for His son, which makes me wonder how He could have made the ultimate sacrifice, sending Jesus Christ to the cross. Just be glad I wasn’t the higher power in charge that day. Let’s just say there would have been a much different ending to the story of faith and forgiveness. I don’t even want my child to get a splinter let alone a nail hammered through her hand. So, becoming a mom reignited that sense of awe and wonder of the Most High. But I definitely needed a few tips to develop spirituality, now that I don’t have as much time to meditate.
Pre-pregnancy, I felt connected to God. I could feel His spirit move through the room, softly whisper into my ear and press upon my heart. While living on the beach in Cayman Islands, I tuned out the noise of the world and focused on my personal relationship with God. I prayed more. I went to church more. I studied scriptures more. This is a picture of me basking in God’s glory on the beach.
So what happened? Life happened. I switched careers. I changed zip codes. I transitioned roles. At first, I felt like God wasn’t by my side. I didn’t think He left. I just didn’t think I was high up on His priority list. I mean, why should He care that I got dumped over the phone in my second trimester? Why would He wipe my tears when my daughter’s dad married someone else the weekend of her first birthday? There are much bigger and more troubling things occurring around the world, like hunger, homelessness and genocides. But He did care. He knew every hair on my head and saw every move that I made. Imagine, if you have more than one child, you don’t only care about the one facing a trial or tribulation. You may extend additional support, but the level of love remains the same. You’re a constant force in the troubled child’s life. They just might not see you or feel your presence through their pain. But you’re right there. Wiping tears. Picking up the pieces. And moving mountains.
So, if you feel disconnected to God now that your a mom, simply apply these tips to develop your spirituality.
1. Trust Him
Three years ago, I was consumed with my breakup with my daughter’s dad. Every conversation was filled with my ex’s name. I wondered what he was doing, who he was doing it with and why he did the things he did. But eventually, I moved from heartache to healing. And trusted God to transform my burden into a blessing. That blessing was right before me. I have a beautiful little girl, who inspired me to create a flourishing business. But to get to this place of peace–and it’s an ongoing journey, I had to trust in God. I had to trust that He wants only the best for his children. I had to trust that He, not a child support check, was my sole source. He would provide comfort and security. And when I worry what the future holds, I must remind myself that God already has mapped out my final destination. I just have to surrender control, and let Jesus take the wheel.
2. Spend Time With Him
You don’t need to schedule an entire day, or even an hour, to spend time with God. Start by setting aside a few minutes. You’ll quickly desire more minutes, hours, days, heck even decades with Him. For me, each morning, I wake up and read the verse of the day on BibleGateway.com and update my Facebook Page Reading the Bible 101. I also watch an online ministry as I get ready for work. My church streams its Sunday services, and I can find additional sermons online. I often listen to Joyce Meyer, since most of her topics fall under themes of hope and restoration. If I’m not in the mood for a sermon, I fill my spirit with music and play Pandora. I created a few gospel playlists that lift my mood with sound.
3. Walk With Him
When I lived on an island, I felt like I was living on the same street as God. I would take a walk every morning, clear my head and reflect on my purpose in life. I would watch the waves gently wash seashells onto the shore. Sometimes I jumped in. The water baptized my body. The sun, and God’s countenance, shined upon me. And all the while, birds chirped in the background. When I moved back to the states, everyone asked why I would ever leave the white sandy beaches behind. I later learned that you can create a sense of calm wherever you reside. Becoming one with nature, no matter what type of nature, helps you tune out the noise of societal stresses. Today, I take walks in the park, feed the ducks and reflect on the fact that no matter where you are, God can reside right in your heart. It is during these moments that I rediscover my purpose and spark new ideas.
4. Talk to Him
I talk. A lot. Just yesterday, I called my sister, who placed me on speaker. After telling her what she considered to be a lengthy story, my nephew chimed in and said, Geesh, Aunt Heather, I thought that story was never going to end. They aren’t alone in their opinions about my motor mouth. My mother has admitted to putting the phone down to do a quick task and returning to the receiver to find me still gabbing away. One person who doesn’t complain about my continuous chatter is God. I can go to Him with just about everything. At first, I was afraid to talk about the more “sinful” behaviors, then I realized that if He does in fact see everything I do, then He already knows what I did! I had a habit of calling my friends first when a problem struck. Now, that I’m a mom, I’ve worked on turning to Him first for advice, comfort and guidance. My prayers aren’t as long as they used to be. With less energy and less sleep, I have mastered short sentences. Thank you. Bless Us. Watch Over Us. Help Me. Fill Me. Forgive Me.
Hey DFTM Moms–How are you developing your spirituality now that you are a mom?